Despite me literally saying in my last post that I don't want to spend too long looking back, here I am reliving the past year of my life through music. Over the past few months I've been filtering through and archiving a lot of my old blog posts, and one of the posts I seem to have left (despite the slightly cringy introduction, although that seems to be a recurring theme here... Who let me start a blog when I was 13?) is 2016 in 16 Songs, which is actually one of my favourites, and it gave me the idea for this post. It seems like a nice and not too intense way to catch you up a little on my life. Plus, my second year starts officially in under a week so what better time to relive the last one? Scroll to the bottom for the Spotify playlist.
Free - Ultra Nate
This is one of the songs that came on during my first ever (!!) night out, which was on the Tuesday of freshers.
Son's Gonna Rise - Citizen Cope, Carlos Santana
For some reason I remember listening to this in the library as I tried not to get behind in the first two weeks... spoiler: it happened anyway.
Make It Wit Chu - Queens of the Stone Age
Dancing in the Moonlight (Its Caught Me in Its Spotlight) - alt-J
Alt-J have always been one of my favourite artists, and I listened to a lot of their music during my first two months of uni.
My favourite lecturer referenced this song. What more can I say?
Oh Wonder have helped me through a fair few tough times in my life, including my first semester of uni. I listened to this album on loop pretty much for a lot of November.
Don't even ask...
It may be cheesy but at least it's upbeat?
Also cheesy but upbeat. I tried.
The Christmas Waltz - Sleeping At Last
My uni didn't break up for Christmas until the 21st of December, at least a week later than a lot of other unis. I felt really homesick during that extra week, and I had a lot going on academically including an exam on the 19th that I was veeerryy underprepared for. To put it simply, this was a tough week and this song matched my mood and helped me deal with my emotions. I listened to it on loop a lot.
I Know It's Over - Jeff Buckley
Over Christmas I had a programming project that I struggled with a fair bit, and I wasn't really able to ask for help because it was the holidays. I worked on it for houuurs, and this song was on the playlist that I listened to as I worked.
Give Me One Reason - Tracy Chapman
Clean the House - Fat Freddy's Drop
Dream Brother - Jeff Buckley
Maneater - Daryl Hall & John Oates
The night before I went back to uni for my second semester, my mum and sister and I had a lil disco in the kitchen listening to 80s music. This is one of my favourites that we listened to. It also helped me through revision for my January exams.
Bad Sun - The Bravery
I don't really know what's going on with this one, but I listened to it on the way to my exams in January, and then again in the summer, so I had to include it.
Start Of The Breakdown - Tears For Fears
Another 80s gem - this album, and H2O by Daryl Hall & John Oates, helped me through a horrifically placed deadline the first week back that had me staying up until gone 5am. I still made my 9am the next day though! In the snow... On two hours sleep... Haha...ha.. Very aptly named song.
For You - Daryl Hall
After a tough few weeks kicked off by that horrendous deadline, and exacerbated by numerous house viewings and getting ill, I decided it was time for a trip home. I listened to this as I was walking to the station after my Friday lectures, and I was so excited for a weekend recovering at home.
Let's Dance to Joy Division - The Wombats
This song is just very upbeat and happy, I need that energy in my life.
South London Forever - Florence + The Machine
I pretty much exclusively listened to Florence + The Machine in both March and April last year, and I listened to this one, Grace and The End Of Love the most.
Hurricane Drunk - Florence + The Machine
"But I like to think at least things can't get any worse"
Wish That You Were Here - Florence + The Machine
Help Me Lose My Mind - Disclosure, London Grammar
I liked this song a lot a few years ago and I rediscovered it in April - I enjoyed listening to this when I was attempting to learn fluid dynamics outside in the Easter sun.
100 Years - Florence + The Machine
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - The Police
I love this song, and it was one of the songs the band played at the summer formal I went to for my course. That evening was definitely one of my favourites of last year, and this song now reminds me of that which is nice.
Sledgehammer - Peter Gabriel
Back on the Chain Gang - Morrissey
This was on my revision playlist for my summer exams; it, along with coffee, helped power me through long revision sessions in my favourite cafe.
Hinnom, TX - Bon Iver
Bon Iver helped me through my last few weeks of uni, which were definitely some of the toughest.
Over Christmas I had a programming project that I struggled with a fair bit, and I wasn't really able to ask for help because it was the holidays. I worked on it for houuurs, and this song was on the playlist that I listened to as I worked.
Give Me One Reason - Tracy Chapman
Clean the House - Fat Freddy's Drop
Dream Brother - Jeff Buckley
Maneater - Daryl Hall & John Oates
The night before I went back to uni for my second semester, my mum and sister and I had a lil disco in the kitchen listening to 80s music. This is one of my favourites that we listened to. It also helped me through revision for my January exams.
Bad Sun - The Bravery
I don't really know what's going on with this one, but I listened to it on the way to my exams in January, and then again in the summer, so I had to include it.
Start Of The Breakdown - Tears For Fears
Another 80s gem - this album, and H2O by Daryl Hall & John Oates, helped me through a horrifically placed deadline the first week back that had me staying up until gone 5am. I still made my 9am the next day though! In the snow... On two hours sleep... Haha...ha.. Very aptly named song.
For You - Daryl Hall
After a tough few weeks kicked off by that horrendous deadline, and exacerbated by numerous house viewings and getting ill, I decided it was time for a trip home. I listened to this as I was walking to the station after my Friday lectures, and I was so excited for a weekend recovering at home.
Let's Dance to Joy Division - The Wombats
This song is just very upbeat and happy, I need that energy in my life.
South London Forever - Florence + The Machine
I pretty much exclusively listened to Florence + The Machine in both March and April last year, and I listened to this one, Grace and The End Of Love the most.
Hurricane Drunk - Florence + The Machine
"But I like to think at least things can't get any worse"
Wish That You Were Here - Florence + The Machine
Help Me Lose My Mind - Disclosure, London Grammar
I liked this song a lot a few years ago and I rediscovered it in April - I enjoyed listening to this when I was attempting to learn fluid dynamics outside in the Easter sun.
100 Years - Florence + The Machine
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - The Police
I love this song, and it was one of the songs the band played at the summer formal I went to for my course. That evening was definitely one of my favourites of last year, and this song now reminds me of that which is nice.
Sledgehammer - Peter Gabriel
Back on the Chain Gang - Morrissey
This was on my revision playlist for my summer exams; it, along with coffee, helped power me through long revision sessions in my favourite cafe.
Hinnom, TX - Bon Iver
Bon Iver helped me through my last few weeks of uni, which were definitely some of the toughest.
21 M◊◊N WATER - Bon Iver
I didn't like this album when it first came out but it really grew on me, as did the end of this song which pretty accurately described my mental state at the end of my first year of uni to be honest...
So yeah, I had a tough year. It wasn’t all bad, but it was definitely the hardest year of my life, and although I think I’m beginning to move past it now, my mental health still needs some work and things haven’t completely changed overnight, or more accurately over summer.
One thing I’ve been conscious of when writing this post is that there’s a fair amount of negativity in it, which is not at all the energy I want my blog to have. I am however a believer in sharing the reality of what you’re going through/have been through, and that of course includes negatives as well as positives. And hopefully this post can help someone not feel so alone if things aren’t turning out at all as well as expected. It’s okay not to love university. A lot of people will tell you that they had a bad first week, first month, first term, whatever, and that it gets better. But what if it doesn’t get better? For me, it didn’t. It got worse. And I found that the longer you hate uni for, the less okay and “socially acceptable” it feels to hate it. But university life isn’t for everyone, and it’s okay if you feel like it's not for you but you still want to complete your degree (aka me). Maybe it really does get better, eventually, but don’t feel pressure to put a timeline on when that’ll be. Just keep on. Keep fighting. You got this.
I didn't like this album when it first came out but it really grew on me, as did the end of this song which pretty accurately described my mental state at the end of my first year of uni to be honest...
So yeah, I had a tough year. It wasn’t all bad, but it was definitely the hardest year of my life, and although I think I’m beginning to move past it now, my mental health still needs some work and things haven’t completely changed overnight, or more accurately over summer.
One thing I’ve been conscious of when writing this post is that there’s a fair amount of negativity in it, which is not at all the energy I want my blog to have. I am however a believer in sharing the reality of what you’re going through/have been through, and that of course includes negatives as well as positives. And hopefully this post can help someone not feel so alone if things aren’t turning out at all as well as expected. It’s okay not to love university. A lot of people will tell you that they had a bad first week, first month, first term, whatever, and that it gets better. But what if it doesn’t get better? For me, it didn’t. It got worse. And I found that the longer you hate uni for, the less okay and “socially acceptable” it feels to hate it. But university life isn’t for everyone, and it’s okay if you feel like it's not for you but you still want to complete your degree (aka me). Maybe it really does get better, eventually, but don’t feel pressure to put a timeline on when that’ll be. Just keep on. Keep fighting. You got this.
Naomi
